Showing posts with label wholeheartedness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label wholeheartedness. Show all posts

Tuesday, June 10, 2014

FINALE - what the heart might say

“It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.”
Antoine de Saint-Exupery


I have spent several posts discussing why we should and how to listen to our hearts and before I have to take a few weeks offline, I thought I should finish up this series with the last steps. Already, we've looked at the groundwork in quieting the mind and beginning a discipline and a practice of meditation. But it's important to look at what we can build on that foundation and how that brings us to a more wholehearted life.

According to Steve Mueller, author of Personal Development Blog Gone Wild, there are an additional eight steps to the practice of listening to one's heart. I'll try to simplify those as much as possible. After learning to meditate and focusing on one's breath, the next step says Mueller is to "go with the flow." By that he means don't try to force your heart to speak or demand that your intuition suddenly become a perfectly clear message. Expecting to "hear voices" dooms us to disappointment - just begin to tune in for the way the messages might come - as a calm certainty, or a profound insight. And when you do recognize an intuitive heart message - make a note of it. Keep a journal or diary of hunches, observations, certainties. Mueller says it's important to keep a record of every time you followed your intuition and found your life improved or felt lighter in spirit. The journal serves another purpose and that is to identify the pattern - the particular way your heart speaks to you, whether that's through hunches or a physical reaction or a sudden clarity. We begin to trust the messages, the voice of our hearts, when we keep a record of what a wonderful guide it is. As Helen Keller once said, "The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen nor touched but are felt in the heart."

Learning to trust our heart messages involves using the mind well - once we've learned how to quiet the mind temporarily in order to meditate and listen to the heart, then we can allow the mind to speak as well. Now it is influenced by the heart rather than being at odds with it. Now our intellect becomes an additional tool for clarifying the heart messages. We need to let our bodies speak as well because the body can translate the language of the heart into language that we may understand more readily. Your throat might tighten, your heart race, your stomach tie in knots when your heart is saying no, wrong choice. You might feel suddenly more energetic, more creative, more peaceful when you're hearing a "yes" intuitively. 

It takes a lot of practice - and it takes time to learn how to listen to the heart without ignoring the intellect and the messages the body sends as well. Don't be impatient and don't give up. For some of us, it's a lifetime of practice. But as Steve Mueller says, "When listening to the wisdom emanating from deep within, you will begin to experience unexpected but supportive synchronicities, things will show up when needed and lessons will be taught once you are ready to perceive their contents, always accompanied by the knowing that your heart will always take care of you.

*** I will be off for several weeks and unable to post or respond to comments. I thank you in advance for coming by, taking the time to read or comment and I'll get back to you as soon as my recovery permits. Thanks for all your lovely support these past months. Lianne xox 



Friday, May 30, 2014

Begin to listen to your HEART– a how to…

“Your true heart is not subject to chaos or limited by pain, fear and neuroses, but is joyful, creative and loving…It is the core, the essence of your being, a reservoir of joy, powerful love and infinite compassion that lies within you.”
magnoliablossnps3cpaintweb
I have been talking a lot about listening to your heart these past few posts. But what does that actually mean and how do we do it? The ancients, philosophers and physicians alike, believed the heart to be not only how we “know” something (as the Hebrew people believed) but actually the very origin of thought, emotion, passion and reason. All those years ago, the wisest knew what we have forgotten or repressed. In our busy, logical culture, to suggest listening to one’s heart is tantamount to elevating emotion, sentimentality, impulse and passion above reason and logic. But that’s incorrect – the heart is the center of both reason and emotion,  practicality and passion. Listening to the heart certainly isn’t about being unreasonable or out of control in any way, but rather being at peace, centered, calm and connected to an inner wisdom we all possess if we will but listen.

To do that, as I mentioned the other day, one must silence the mind to some extent. Not ignore it…just get it to rest while we think with our hearts first. The mind is capable of exquisite creativity but it’s also bound to the physical aspects of life…with all its fears and uncertainties – will this work? Will I have enough? Will I succeed? But the heart cares only about our well-being (both physical and emotional), our happiness, and our spiritual growth and enlightenment. So how do we start to listen?

First, we have to consciously confront our bias in favor of the mind. Making decisions, we are almost certainly going to seek the rational and logical answer and ignore any intuition that suggests that might not be the best way to go. Intuition communicates an inner heart wisdom to us in many ways and we must recognize the signs in order to really listen. Have you ever made a logical decision about a career path, a relationship, an opportunity but had your stomach tie up in knots? Suddenly, you’re not so sure – some other center of knowing is giving us a different answer, suggesting that our decision may not ultimately be the right one. More often the heart speaks in hunches, sudden insights, or a profound certainty that is different from our analytical and linear resolution to our problem.

The first actual step toward listening and living from the heart, then, is to quiet the rational mind. How? Well, the ancients, especially in eastern thought and philosophy but also in Western religious thought, knew that one had to substitute one repetitive sound or thought for all the racing noisy thoughts that fill our heads all the time. Adopting a mantra (a Sanskrit word that means to “protect from or free from the mind.”) is a very effective way. Traditional mantras include the well known “Om” – a sacred syllable representing the source of life. Pronounced Aum with an extended resonating hum, this sound is one of the most natural to all human beings and combined with a technique of breathing in on the first part of the syllable and breathing out and holding the second part, this mantra can quickly rid the mind of extraneous thought, opening it to “hear” the messages from the heart. But you can accomplish this same purpose by repeating any single or double syllable word that you associate with something greater than the mind. Christians and Jews might use the Aramaic word “Abba” which means “father” or more intimately, “daddy.” It is considered one of the sacred names or titles of God.

Sitting comfortably with eyes closed and repeating some mantra is one of the first tools of meditation…and that’s the second step toward quieting the mind and opening the heart. I’m no expert and I’m not as consistent as I wish with meditation practice but I do have some thoughts and some guided meditations designed specifically to open the heart or “clear” the heart chakra. That’s where we’ll go next time – releasing the energy of the heart. I'll include a soundtrack for a guided meditation and some other suggestions for how to get started or improve your meditation practice. Till Tuesday then...I'll leave you with this profound truth from Franz Kafka - 


Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Why we should listen to our hearts...

"...the only way to know yourself, is to be yourself. And the only way to be yourself is to listen to your heart."
Mike Dooley

Entrer Dans Mon Coeur

One of the most important aspects of wholehearted living...living from the heart...is learning to listen to what your heart is actually telling you. Certainly, we've all heard that advice before - follow your heart, your heart always tells you the truth. But how does one actually do that? And is there any reason to believe that the heart really can communicate something different than what we "think" in our heads? Yes, actually there are a number of scientific reasons to believe that "listening" to the heart is important and how to begin to do that. 

Believe it or not, there is a significant amount of research that suggests that the heart controls the mind rather than the other way around. This is tremendously difficult for many of us to accept, living as we do in a mind-dominated society where logic and analytical thinking seem to be the driving force behind our decision-making. But according to Dr. Joel Kahn, in an article entitled, "7 Scientific Reasons to Listen to Your Heart (Not Your Brain), the heart is actually the "little brain" with 40,000 neurons communicating with the brain and the whole field of research into this communication is called neurocardiology. So the heart speaks to the brain and the body in four particular ways - through the nervous system, by hormones produced in the heart itself, biomechanically through blood pressure waves and with "energy" information from the electrical and electromagnetic fields of the body. 

The findings are rather surprising - the heart communicates with the brain far more often than the other way around and the heart emits far more electrical energy than the brain as well. Probably one of the most startling facts to come out of the research is the fact that the electromagnetic field of the heart can be measured by EKG anywhere on the body but also from several feet away! 

Here's the kicker though -  "Activity in one person's heart can be measured in the brain waves of another person." The electromagnetic field of two individuals (human or pet and human), touching or within a few feet of each other, can interact so that energy activity in the heart of one individual is measured in the brain waves of the other. The act of touch for healing therapies can be postulated to be due to this method of communication." The electrical activity of the heart and the brain can be guided into a synchronous electrical rhythm easily measured and displayed by simply focusing on positive and loving emotions emanating from the heart. This state of organ “coherence” is associated with improved higher level functioning, lower blood pressure and cortisol levels, and improved immune system function." (Dr. Joel Kahn). There is apparently a lot to be said for the "laying on of hands" for healing another person and there have been some incredible proofs offered in the past few years including one shared by Dr. Gregg Braden where the healers didn't even touch the sick person - they just "sent" healing energy to the sick person and in that way completely shrunk a malignant tumor. The entire process was captured on time lapse sonograms. 

All well and good but that still sounds as if it's all about science and the mind - there must be an emotional component to the idea of listening to the heart and it's that component that is the foundation for learning to be aware of what the heart is trying to tell us. Clearly, one of the first steps in this wholehearted living process is learning to respect but at the same time quiet the mind.

More on that on Friday - and some of the rest of the steps to following your heart...





Friday, May 16, 2014

Wholeheartedness - a journey into living from the heart

A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge.
Thomas Carlyle


There is a lot of talk these days about living from the heart, speaking from the heart and following one's heart. Self-help gurus have written volumes on the subject and the internet is chock full of blogs on similar subjects. Oprah has had whole series on opening the heart so as to live a happier life. I just couldn't resist jumping into the topic with both feet for a lot of reasons. (So I'm going to be spending the next few posts on the subject in one way or another). For me, the idea of living from the heart is like coming home to these rolling hills and autumn colors.

In the first place, something I learned in grad school that is closely related to this idea has stayed with me a long time...in fact, I can still quotes sections of my thesis having to do with just how the heart plays into the concept of living well and living right and I'll share that first today. But beyond that, I'm a big fan of social researcher Brené Brown and have heard her speak a number of times about the importance of wholeheartedness in having a happy life regardless of circumstances. And then I belong to a group of women who get together at least once a month to talk about alternative spirituality - living our lives not so much in accordance with traditional religious practices but guided by what seems to us to be something bigger, broader and more inclusive than that. Such conversations have led inevitably to talk about the role our heart plays versus the role of the mind. 

I don't think my group is unique - I think that millions of people around the world are seeking what in Eastern thought is called "enlightenment" - awakening to the idea that we are all so much more than just brains and minds sitting on top of a physical body designed to just carry it around. People are studying about energy centers, chakras, learning to "breathe into the heart," to get their minds out of the way or to silence it in order to hear what the heart has to say and feel the difference between heart energy and mind energy. 

As I said, this whole subject has been of great interest to me for most of my adult life and remains an active focus of my own spiritual practice. I find that the more I learn of this, the more I truly understand what my traditional religious upbringing should have taught me, what authentic religious practice ought to look like and feel like. It started with a simple statement in a theology book that I was using as a reference for a section of my thesis in grad school. The section was called "knowledge of God" and referred to a passage in Hosea 4:6 that reads, "My people perish (or are destroyed) for lack of knowledge..." Reading further, I discovered that in the Hebrew faith, one can only know something, but especially can only know God, from the heart. The heart is the center of knowing. That's it...one "knows" only from the heart - not from the mind. If you only comprehend something with your mind, you actually don't know it at all. 

Remembering this lesson many years later, when I took up the pen to write poetry again, and embarking on a relationship that many people cautioned me against, I wrote this poem, entitled "Heart Knowing."

Heart Knowing
          The heart has a language of its own.
Though I must silence my mind to hear it,
it thinks better than my head and remembers too;
this perfect center of my self-knowing,
is an ever faithful guardian of my truth.
The heart listens, hears a voice in the silence,
attending its ear to a word no other hears.
Attending its sight to a vision no other sees,
at the farthest edge of my hermetic solitude,
the darkest shadows of the moonless nights,
my trusting heart is lighted from within
with the incandescent flame of love.
My heart knows what my logical mind
cannot begin to even contemplate,
recognizes the sublime where my eyes
see too often a world both stark and cold
or the desolate dry expanse of the desert.
Only the graceful heart can truly know
another shining soul with loving intimacy.
It was my heart that knew you first,
a love my head could not have known,
and my heart that felt your inner beauty
pass through my very being like sunrise
through stained glass windows facing dawn.
My heart it was that named you Beloved,
Anam Cara, soul companion of my life,
my heart that takes its comfort, its very purpose
from the hopeful dreams of exquisite longing
for your heart, your body opening to mine.
This heart I offer you, my love, this mystical portal
through which we might together enter heaven’s gate;
is my simple gift of joyful, true “heart knowing”
after a graced and lifelong apprenticeship of love.


According to Jennifer Hoffman, author of the blog "Enlightening Life," The potential of your life exists within the knowing of your heart and soul. Yet you use your mind to determine what is possible and its limitations prevent the highest potential from being available to you." 

I cannot help but agree that the mind can be an obstacle to the kind of knowing we need if we are to live "wholeheartedly." I won't say that listening to my heart, knowing something in my heart, led immediately to happily ever after or that such knowing can't and won't ultimately "break" your heart (but that is a subject for another post). But I will say, quoting diplomat and poet Robert Bulwer-Lytton, 1st Earl of Lytton, "A good heart is better than all the heads in the world."

http://lianne-schneider.artistwebsites.com/featured/farm-country-autumn-sheldon-ny-lianne-schneider.html